


Warm Presence in a Cold World

by spectreofstardust



Category: GOT7
Genre: #PROVEIT, First GOT7 Fic, Flowers, Grave Visit, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm crying and you might be, I'm proud, Jaebum still loves him, Love Confessions, M/M, Mark is dead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-31
Updated: 2017-07-31
Packaged: 2018-12-09 08:31:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11665437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spectreofstardust/pseuds/spectreofstardust
Summary: They were always there for each other when no one else was.Based of the Twitter GOT7 Murder Mystery Game #PROVEIT! (There’s still time to join and help us find the killer)Mark was always the kid who got all the attention. That is, until he was murdered at swim practice during their college years. Jaebum visits his tombstone often, more often then he really should. This time, he has something important to say.





	Warm Presence in a Cold World

**Author's Note:**

> Hello everyone! Please go check out the Murder Mystery Game if you want! You can find it by searching #PROVEIT on Twitter! This fic is assuming that Jaebum innocent, soo.... yeah...
> 
> I know that people aren’t buried in cemeteries in Korea, but I liked that idea better so I just went with it.
> 
> Rewriting this was hard because I kept crying, so eventually I decided to go with this version. I recommend that you listen to Suspicious Partner OST Part 3 while listening to this!

Jaebum pulled his coat tighter around himself as the cold autumn breeze blew through the trees. The rustling of the dry leaves on the ground was the only sound. It was as if the world was holding its breath, waiting for him to make the first move.

Crossing the threshold was always the hardest part.

He had thought it would get easier to cross from the loud and bustling world of the living into the quiet world of the dead. It was ridiculous, but he always felt like he was leaving behind a possibility, an alternate reality, where his best friend wasn’t murdered.

At least out there he could pretend.

He could pretend that everything was okay and that Mark hadn’t been murdered; that he hadn’t been taken away at such a young age for such a petty reason. Out there, he could pretend that Mark was still alive, enjoying his days in the city that he loved.

He released a shaky breath once he reached it.

Mark’s tombstone greeted him as it always did, somber and unforgiving. Jaebum did what he could to keep it clean. He clutched the fresh lilies tighter in his hand before placing them onto the pile of bouquets.

The cemetery wasn’t too big, but Jaebum could still navigate it with his eyes closed. He spent too much time here right after Mark’s death; he wouldn’t eat, he wouldn’t sleep, he would only sit there and talk to the tombstone.

And now, he still spends too much time there, but at least he’s better at hiding it from his friends.

They don’t know he’s here right now. He pulls his phone out of his pocket to turn it off and slips it back in. It should be just the two of them.

“Hey Mark,” Jaebum begins softly, tears already filling his vision. “I know I was here last week, but I just miss you so much.”

Jaebum spent hours in the cemetery visiting Mark. Some days he would visit multiple times just because he couldn’t stand to be away. His friends thought it was an unhealthy obsession, an inability to let go of the past and move on; Jaebum saw it as visiting a friend. A friend he loved dearly.

There were no holidays coming up and it wasn’t an anniversary of any kind. Jaebum was visiting Mark to visit him, not to celebrate. Although, Thanksgiving, Mark’s favorite holiday, was coming up soon.

“I wanted to let you know that I’ll be here on the 25th. Jimin agreed to cover my classes for me without asking why. Although, I think he already knows….”

Luckily for Jaebum, Jimin never questioned why he started celebrating the American holiday. He probably knew, but it was easier for Jaebum if he didn’t have to explain it. Expressing his reasons aloud would be too much for him.

Here Jaebum stood, in his late 20s with a career, while Mark would never pass the age of 22. He would stay that young, beautiful boy forever with the bright smile.

Jaebum’s 23rd birthday had been the worst day of his life. He had reached an age Mark never would. All he did was sit in his room and think of his fondest memories with Mark, but even that couldn't stop the pain. His friends tried to be there for him, but they could never understand. They would never understand like Mark did.

“I’ll bring a huge turkey and all your favorite sides. It’ll be great.”

Since there was no special holiday, there wasn’t another soul in the cemetery. Jaebum liked it that way. He needed his time alone with Mark and he didn’t have to feel weird about talking to the air.

“Me? Uh, I’m okay. Things have been going well at work. Jimin and I are thinking about opening a second studio.”

Jaebum had barely finished college, but he was happy to have his business degree. Once he was done, he moved in with Park Jimin and the two opened up a dance studio together. Dancing and singing were the things Jaebum really loved to do, so he decided to put his business degree to best use.

He hadn’t talked to his parents since his last day of college, the day he lost his temper and left without packing anything.

He and Jimin had been close ever since. The pair had a rough start, but now the studio was thriving. People from the town over were encouraging them to open another studio and the two dancers were actually considering it. It was a dream come true.

“I’m not sure if it’s a good idea, but I would really like to do it. I don’t know…” He let out a light sigh. “You’d know exactly what to do.”

There were so many things that Jaebum could have done differently. He could have insisted Mark play Overwatch with him or he could’ve joined Mark at his swim practice.

He spent so much time on the what ifs right after Mark died that he wasn’t sure what was real. It wasn’t until his teachers requested he go to Grief Counseling that he started to take care of himself again.

Jaebum blinks and looks off at the horizon to stop his mind from going down that path.

The worst part was, he never got to tell Mark that he loved him. That was why people didn’t understand. If he couldn’t say “I love you” to Mark, then he wasn’t going to tell anyone else. The person who most deserved to hear those words never would, and it was all because Jaebum was too much of a coward. That was a burden he would carry around for the rest of his life.

It’s been so long since Jaebum shed a tear at Mark’s tombstone, but he can feel the warm tears rolling down his cheeks now.

“I loved you so much, Mark. I loved you and you have to understand that. I wish you were still here with every beat of my heart. You meant everything to me.” Then, in a whisper, “I was gonna tell you when we were playing Overwatch, but then you had swim practice so I was just gonna tell you the next time I saw you."

Jaebum looks down at his feet and doesn’t let the words on Mark’s tombstone come into focus. He let the tears roll down his face as his body shook with sobs. It was something that would never happen now, no matter how much he wished it.

He could remember the confusion that overtook him when the police told him Mark was dead. He thought it was a practical joke, that someone had found out about his feelings for Mark and was joking around with him.

That would have hurt a whole lot less. Jaebum spent months feeling as if he were underwater and not caring if he was drowning.

“I’m so sorry and this is all my fault. I should have prevented this.”

In the back of his head, he knows that’s ridiculous. There’s no way he could have known what was going to happen, but Mark had always been there for him and he hadn’t been there for Mark in his last moments.

He glances down at his watch and realizes that an hour has already passed. He looks at the tombstone sadly as he wipes away his tears.

“I’m sorry, Mark, but I have to go. If I’m late to teach another class, Jimin might actually kill me this time.”

He places a hand on the tombstone and closes his eyes. He can feel Mark, watching over him; the only warm presence in a cold world.

“I miss you. I love you. I’ll see you later.”

Those were the three sentences Jaebum always said before leaving Mark. As he walked away, he was already forming a plan to come back later that day. This time with a colorful bouquet.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm proud of this fic! It's my first GOT7 one that I've actually published. Please let me know what you think??
> 
> Don’t forget to support JJP’s new MV!


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